September 5, 2022

Tips for Eloping with Your Kids

There are so many pros and cons to eloping with your kids.

Whether they are teens or toddlers, having your kids around for your elopement wedding adventure can be a wonderful way to share your joy, lead as an example in love, and get some updated family photos.

On the flip side, eloping with your kids can have the potential to make it a little less intimate and presents more variables, as every person or child you bring along to your elopement has unique needs that must be considered.

This all being said, it’s a personal choice you get to make after weighing the pros and cons, and we believe that as long as you are eloping outdoors and keeping it close-knit and small, you can’t go wrong!

So let’s explore with some of our best tips for eloping with your kids.

Fun Ways to Include Your Kids in your Ceremony

Family First Look

A first look usually is a time before the ceremony when couples decide to see each other in their wedding dig’s for the first time. Sometimes the focus is a big reveal where the groom sees the bride in their dress, or the bride or groom may have a first look with their father or parent.

So why not a first look with your kids? Chances are they will be excited to see their parents all dolled up. If they are toddlers or young kids you can make it a fun game where they run up to you and you pick them up into the air and all have a family moment.

This will make for really awesome photos that express the joy of the experience and capture the excitement before the “I do’s” are said. This time is also perfect for getting some good photos before the kids get too tired as the day wears on and also to capture your hair and makeup fresh!

Child Plays Officiant

Okay now before you run away from this article thinking I am nuts, hear me out. I am not actually suggesting to have your child officiate your entire ceremony (unless they are older or an amazing public speaker) but instead, consider giving them a small but important speaking part. As the officiates pronounces you married partners, you can have your child say “you may now kiss each other!”

This is just a cute way to include them, especially if your child is outgoing or likes to be involved in the action!

Give them a Unique Job in your Ceremony

Whether it’s giving a speech during or after the ceremony, fluffing your dress, or holding onto the rings (yikes why does that sound so much scarier than it should) giving your child a fun job in your ceremony is a great way to include them and keep them engaged.

If your child has a talent they like to share like singing, this might be appropriate to include in the ceremony or during your first dance!

Other ideas might be sharing a poem or reading, walking with you down the aisle, watching/holding on to the family dog, or anything else simple or creative that fits.

Vows from Parent to Child

One of the sweetest moments you can witness in a ceremony is a step-parent reciting vows to their partner’s child.

It’s hard not to cry hearing an adult pledge to nurture their partner’s child.

Warning – this nearly always causes tears from the one reciting, the partner, those watching, and sometimes even the child!

Pro Tip: If you are doing this in your ceremony and do not have a videographer filming it, you definitely should consider adding that! This memory will be pure gold to look back on (especially if the child is young and you can embarrass them later on in life or during the teenage years).

Family Letter Box

At wedding ceremonies it is common to see couples put a letter they have written each other into a box to be opened on their ten year anniversary.

A great way to make it a family activity is to add in a letter from your child to you, their parents. This “wedding gift/ letter” could simply be a message of congratulations, a picture they draw, or they can share their favorite things about being your kids and having you as parents. It will be so fun to look back on later!

Logistics:

Plan for Kiddo Challenges or Meltdown

Bringing your child along on your elopement means they might encounter some normal kid (and frankly, human) challenges.

Maybe they will be too hot, too cold, or not handle the hike well.

If they are young, they might just want your attention at key moments and get a little fussy over time.

It’s good to plan for this in mind.

Make sure the family photo-list isn’t too long and that you build in a few minutes of play-time after the ceremony to relax.

Packing them their favorite toy, snack, or blanket can make all the difference.

For older kids, make sure they are aware of the challenges of the location and season, and dress accordingly in the appropriate layers as well as bring plenty of snacks and drinks for the ride and the hike.

You can’t plan for everything but try to anticipate and prepare for the challenges that may arise.

Consider a Kid Sitter

If you are bringing a toddler, baby, or small child, it is highly suggested that you bring a friend along to help wrangle your kiddo.

Some elopement companies, like ours, can also help provide someone to come along and watch your kids.

If you are going to be on a mountain peak or cliff, you have multiple youngin’s, or just want to be able to fully relax, we recommend looking into bringing someone along to help!

Teach Kids to Pack in & Pack out

If you are going to be out in nature, especially somewhere remote, drop some knowledge on your kids about how to keep things litter-free.

Let them know that going out in nature holds great responsibility and that in order to keep these places safe and existing, we need to pack in and pack out and leave no trace of trash behind.

Make sure to bring along a bag to carry trash out like food package wrappers, tissues, foil from champagne, and other items that might end up becoming litter.

By doing so, you share the responsibility and place trust in your little ones. Even a 3 or 4 year old might take it to heart and want to do their part to keep the land litter free!

Cake Cutting Inclusion

Are you bringing along a cake on your elopement? Some of our packages include a custom locally made cake and champagne and our day-of assistant brings – even hikes- it your location, setting up a whole picnic.

If you are getting a cake, make sure to have enough for the kids or guests.

You can also choose to get kid-themed cupcakes for them instead if you want to keep the good stuff for you!

Either way, be ready to share a slice, provide an alternative option, or have another guest watch the kids during the cake cutting so you can do that solo.

Make sure to take time for just the two of you

When kids are involved, it is of course so easy to give all your attention to them.

But if you can prepare by building in some alone time, you will get to be more present and share special time with your partner.

A lot of couples have a private first look before the ceremony while a friend or sitter is watching their child in the car or nearby but out of the way. This is such a great way to ground into the experience before bringing others into the equation.

Another option is to have guests and your child depart shortly after the ceremony and family photos so you can take your couples photos without any distractions.

This is where bringing along a friend or sitter comes in handy as you are able to steal away and have some “just us” time.

Want to elope in the Asheville, NC area?

We can help you with the entire process from securing vendors from our talented team of photographers, cake bakers, florists, officiants, and more, all the way through planning for weather, timing your events, and making your vision come to life!